I hear some actors are going to boycott the Oscars. There was talk about all of Hollywood boycotting the Oscars to show their disdain for our new President. Too bad it was only talk. I was hoping they would take it a step further and go on strike.
Think about it. Has anything worth watching come out of Hollywood in the last twenty years? The last good film I saw in the theater was Titantic. Oh wait. I saw this animated picture last summer about feelings at the outdoor that was pretty good, but I can’t remember the name of it. But I really liked it.
In order for Hollywood to go on strike they would have to present some legitimate issues. Unfortunately, the only thing legitimate coming out of Hollywood these days is whiny, overpaid actors. But, if some precious silence comes from my efforts, it’s worth a try. Here are some “reasonable” grievances (by Hollywood standards) that they could use to strike.
Normal workers will usually decide to strike because of low wages, poor working conditions, or inadequate benefits.
Judging by some Hollywood salaries, I have my work cut out for me. According to Forbes, Dwayne Johnson at number one pulled in $64.5 million last year. Shah Rukh Khan (whoever that is) came in at number 10 at $33 million.
The actresses might have an argument that they could use. There was only one woman in the top 20. I know the Hollywood gals often complain about this wage disparity, so maybe they could organize a strike in Leonardo Dicaprio’s driveway.
I’m sure there is plenty of room for their picket lines.
I hear that Leonardo is a such a ladies’ man, he would probably welcome them and even cater a nice lunch for them: organic with the least amount of carbon footprint to produce.
The paparazzi will surely follow the gals so they’ll get plenty of press. What pictures the MSM (mainstream media) doesn’t get, the actresses will provide on their social media. We’ll benefit because they’ll be complaining about something that we don’t care about and not be making any bad movies. I’d say that’s a win/win.
What about working conditions? This could be a tough one to argue, too.
As I understand it, an actor gets to choose his working conditions. He reads a script and decides to take the role or not. If he takes the role, he accepts where the film will be shot. When he’s not on set, he gets a trailer big enough for a family of four that someone stocks for him with specific food and drink noted in his contract. Most employees are lucky to get a break room with a refrigerator where they can stash their lunch.
Let’s not forget that he also has someone to drive him to work, to tell him what to wear, a personal trainer if required and finally a script that shows what to say. Looks like an actor doesn’t really have to do too much for himself. I presume the actors are potty trained.
I suppose he could argue that his trailer isn’t big enough, or his cotton sheets don’t have a high enough thread count. After all, he’s been pretending to be this super hero since he was five and should be compensated for all this preparation.
We have one final reason, benefits. Most employees would like more vacation time, a better retirement package or help with health insurance. Actors can take vacation whenever they want, but they don’t get paid. Why not argue that they should be like the rest of the work force and get a paid vacation.
They could strike for a personal financial adviser, since it’s hard for them to think for themselves when everything else is done for them. And, if they do buy insurance, maybe they could fight for unlimited plastic surgery and Botox treatments.
From the little people’s point of view, it sounds like Hollywood doesn’t have a good reason to strike. Does that mean the actors should reconsider?
When the garbage picker-uppers strike, we have a problem. Garbage piles up, rats take over, disease spreads and bubonic plague threatens our livelihood. When bus drivers go on strike, people have to bum rides off their co-workers. Co-workers put up with it for a while but then find themselves compelled to join a dating website that requires them to be on call 24/7 so they have an excuse for not being available to tote co-worker to work. This situation puts a strain on the working relationship and on some marriages.
Pretty soon you have a hostile workplace and the company has to hire outside consultants to set up safe spaces.
If Hollywood goes on strike, the worst that could happen would be no new movies to waste, I mean, spend your money on. And Hollywood would be fighting for their favorite cause, themselves. There is no downside. Another win/win.
Everyone is happy and we can all go home. I’d have time to watch my Carry Grant movies, and if we’re lucky, the whiners will STAY home and give the rest of us a break.